Five Ways to Get Hyped Up for the GameCube Launch
Written By: Roger Taylor

This is being written on October 30, and I find I can hardly contain my excitement about the launch of the GameCube, only a few weeks away. Thankfully, I have found a few ways to channel my excitement until the big day. Hopefully some of these tactics will prevent you from driving yourself insane with anticipation.

5. To psych up for Wave Race: Blue Storm:

Find your old copy of Wave Race 64, and bask in its glory. Then start playing. Keep doing so until your analog stick breaks off from trying to ride your Jet Ski backwards one too many times.

4. To psych up for Star Wars Rogue Squadron 2: Rogue Leader:

Watch the entire Star Wars Trilogy. And yes, I do mean trilogy. I’m sorry, but Episode One just doesn’t count. Lucas just don’t have it no more. And don’t give me that crap that Episode Two will be better. I’m not seeing any picture with a title like Episode 2: Attack of the Clones unless it’s a cheesy 50’s horror flick.

3. To psych up for Super Monkey Ball:

Besides having the coolest name of any game in history (face it, monkeys are funny), Super Monkey Ball has also received some of the best reviews so far of any launch game. For those of you who don’t know, Super Monkey Ball is basically the NES classic Marble Madness, only with a clear ball with a monkey in it instead of a marble. If it’s the party game that everyone hopes it will be, there’s only one proper way to psych up for Monkey Ball. Follow these steps:

1. Buy hamster (or monkey if possible)
2. Buy hamster ball (or ball large enough to hold monkey)
3. Invite at least 3 friends over
4. Place hamster (once again, or monkey) in ball
5. Roll ball around with friends
6. Watch chaos ensue

2. To psych up for Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 3:

Find a copy of THPS 1 or 2 and play it till you can’t stand the repeating songs anymore. Once that is done, impress your friends by showing all the tricks you learned from the game. Oh yeah, NGF cannot be held liable for any injuries you may suffer attempting a 720.

1. To psych up for Luigi’s Mansion:

Go out on Halloween with a vacuum strapped to your back. Begin speaking in Italian and turn on the vacuum whenever you encounter someone dressed as a ghost and try and suck his or her costume off. Do not attempt on unattractive men if it looks like they aren’t wearing anything underneath.

If you’re looking forward to something not on this list, fear not. If all else fails you can always hold a Goldeneye tournament…and enjoy the hell out of your N64 one last time.

Posted: 10-31-01